thanks to the betas

+1
Martin Scorcese with his science:  gyllenhawl.tumblr.com/post/837…

+2
Read a book in June:  pinkymccoversong.deviantart.co…

logline practice
A burned out crook violates her moral code and is driven to get out of the game.
A nihilistic burn out struggles to survive but is on the hook for one last score.
A morally flexible hustler goes all in on one last job only to discover a buried secret.

I'll get better at this

+3, from a brother gone too soon
a long but important read to make you look at yourself:  www.salon.com/2014/04/13/david…

But David Foster Wallace predicted a hopeful turn. He could see a new wave of artistic rebels who “might well emerge as some weird bunch of anti-rebels… who dare somehow to back away from ironic watching, who have the childish gall actually to endorse and instantiate single-entendre principles… Who eschew self-consciousness and hip fatigue.” Yet Wallace was tentative and self-conscious in describing these rebels of sincerity. He suspected they would be called out as “backward, quaint, naïve, anachronistic.” He didn’t know if their mission would succeed, but he knew real rebels risked disapproval. As far as he could tell, the next wave of great artists would dare to cut against the prevailing tone of cynicism and irony, risking “sentimentality,” “ovecredulity” and “softness.”

+5
I needed to come up with a new beginning for a story that I'm working on.  I've never liked the beginning but never knew how to start it better.  It starts with dialogue and I don't really like doing that unless something really unusual is said (it's also a habit of mine to start stories with someone's name -- it's a cheater's way to start).  But it hit me today -- think about what was happening 5-10 minutes before the beginning and use THAT as the beginning instead.  It seems so obvious.  I'm sure I've seen that advice somewhere in the past and it just clicked in at a good time.  Here's hoping it works.

Thanks for the help so far with NH
wordeea Rovanna Edges-to-Everything xlntwtch Wolfrug angeljunkie neurotype-on-discord SRSmith dietcocaine CactussKate ilyilaice

I'm taking it down from this journal because it is completely different and don't want to waste anyone else's time with reading it -- I will post the revised version when it is finished.  i appreciate everyone's time, no doubt. 

to Chezzy-Am -- if you were still planning on helping me out with the Nobody's Heroine piece and still want to, hold off until i post the new version.  so much has changed in the last week with it.

editing is a nightmare, as usual
So many changes.  Jesus.  The ending is killing me.  it's so much shit to go through.  i swear to god this better be worth it.